Being the rebel that accepts themselves
“In a society that profits from your self-doubt, liking yourself is a rebellious act.” - Caroline Caldwell
Before we begin, I want to announce that I will be away for a couple of weeks on vacation—the kind of vacation where I don’t bring my laptop and actually be present in the moment. So, there will not be a new newsletter for a couple of weeks. The good news is that I will probably have a fun blog-style newsletter of activities from my trip when I get back. So there’s that! As always, thanks again for your support. Okay, on to today’s newsletter…
I would just like to live my millennial life without the need to be reminded that I’m getting older. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t mind getting older because I know that’s the package deal that comes with being a human… you get older. However, it’s such a weird concept to me, the constant conversation on how the younger generations can tell when other generations are older than them. I mean, I definitely know that I am older because I hardly recognize any nominees at the Grammy Awards now. I knew of Beyoncé back in her Destiny’s Child days, and the pop songs I loved in high school are on the “oldies” radio station played in grocery stores now. Apparently, now someone can tell I’m a millennial because I wear ankle socks instead of crew, I use a bunch of emojis in texts, and, oh yeah, I have a side part in my hair.
The whole conversation on how to disguise one’s age and appear younger also reminds me of the same conversation had on how to look thinner. It boils down to this: We should not be happy with how we look and, therefore, should be doing everything in our power to change and contort our bodies. I know that wearing hair with a middle part and putting crew socks on our feet is not really contorting the body; however, the message is still very clear: You aren’t great with how you look now, and maybe you should try to do something about it.
The body positivity movement seemed to be in full force a couple of years ago. And no, this was not the start of the movement (it was started by folks in larger bodies, many of who were women of color); I even wrote about the history of it in my book that’s available for preorder now. *Shameless plug.* Think back to 2020 and what was happening. I mean, a ton of events were happening with the whole world trying to figure out and cope with COVID-19, and many antiracist movements were also happening (think about the protests due to the murder of George Floyd.) Many of us were stuck at home and not in our usual environments, and there seemed to be a surge of body-positive movements happening simultaneously. We seemed to be trying to give ourselves more grace as humans, realizing how fragile our time on earth was and trying to live the best ways we could. It should also be said that the body-positive movement was never perfect because it always seemed to be more about thin, white, cis, able-bodied women.
Now, we are onto a new movement and a shift in society. Thin is “back in.” In 2022, many media articles decided to publish stories claiming that heroin chic was back.
I remember the time in society when Kate Moss was one of the top supermodels and had a famous waif figure. I will never say that a single person caused diet culture or eating disorders because this is a system, not a person. But what I will say is that a person can contribute to it by saying something like, “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” This was back in 2009, yet here we are, recycling this same method of thinking. Everything old is new again, and unfortunately, we tend to treat bodies as trends. I wrote about this earlier in the year, link below:
We are in the age of Ozempic® and Wegovy® (and I’m not talking about Ozempic® taken for diabetes; I’m talking purely for weight loss.) I am still and will always be a weight-inclusive dietitian, so I will not promote weight because I believe in focusing on promoting health behaviors, but I do also understand the desire for it, and I don’t think that anyone who wants to lose weight is wrong. At the end of the day, I am all about body autonomy. So what does this have to do with Gen Z telling us they can tell when generations are older than them? Everything. Because there is an unsaid statement being made about trying to fit the status quo and change in order to fit in. Think about what the economy would look like if everyone was happy with themselves and what they looked like. Really think about it.
Capitalism is counting on you trying to fit in with the younger crowd and purchasing a pair of crew socks that you really don’t need. It sounds nonsensical, but really think about it for a second. According to Marketdata, the total U.S. weight loss market reached new highs of $89.9 billion in 2023. The market is expected to grow another 4.3% to $93.8 billion in 2024. Diet culture as a whole is worth billions and billions of dollars. Can you imagine how much that total would be if we were to actually have body positivity? Let’s look at purchasing different clothes to appear more youthful. The average adult aged 25-34 spends $161 per month on clothing, while adults aged 35-44 spend slightly more, at $209 per month. And as a surprise to probably no one, on average, women aged 16 and over, spend 76% more than men of the same age.
I should also disclose that I am not judging anyone for wanting to change up their wardrobe or for having fun with fashion. I worked in the fashion industry for 9 years, which I also wrote about, link below:
I, too, love to play around with different clothes because even though my old industry was low-key traumatizing (again, I wrote a little bit about my experiences in my new book), I still enjoy the creativity that comes with it. So, I promise you I’m not judging or criticizing here. My intentions are always to point out certain things because sometimes we are so accustomed and desensitized to our actions in society. I know I usually discuss the constant desire for thinness (i.e., diet culture), but I can’t help but notice the similarity in the desire to look younger. It boils down to us never being satisfied with how we look because we are told to try to strive to look like something else. Specifically something that we need to spend lots of money on in order to achieve.
No, I am not getting rid of my ankle socks just because Gen Z said so. Nor am I getting rid of my side part because that’s how my hair naturally falls, and I like it. I also do not love my appearance all the time and have my days because I’m human. It honestly isn’t easy just existing in this world because of how we have been conditioned, but I think about this quote from Caroline Caldwell every now and then.
“In a society that profits from your self-doubt, liking yourself is a rebellious act.”
Like what you just read, or maybe you have more questions on the topic? This is a friendly reminder that I wrote a book on this topic and much more. Live Nourished is available for preorder now! Please click this link to get your copy.
Really enjoy your writing, so thought provoking
I remember trying to convince myself skinny was going to feel better than being full. Ugh. I am a Xellenial, so I was right in the thick of the heroin chic days, wishing I could have hip bones that jutted out. At almost 44, I’m happy to be reclaiming that 90s style I loved so much in the body I have.